The first annual fat guy pool party.

If you work with me and you're a fat guy. I want you to come to my place for a bbq/pool party. Here's the criteria.

1). You have to be overweight. (I get to decide if you make the cut)
2). If you have a certificate stating you're medically obese you're automatically in.
3). You have to like beer in unreasonable amounts.
4). Required dress code. 1). Sandals 2). Hawaiian Shirt 3). Speedo
5). You either have to be extremely tanned or you must be fleshy pink. The sort of pale skin that will burn when exposed to the sun. No in-betweens.
6). You must be loud and boisterous.

And what do you get?

1). All you can eat BBQ. Not pussy salads. 100% meat. (Four kinds of animal)
2). All you can drink beer. (Keg draft beer)
3). Loose women. (They are attracted to bodies of water in this heat)
4). A chance to cannonball with several men of your own girth. (Imagine the waves)
5). A chance to appear in the company charity calender aptly titled. "Hauling Ass!"

Email your application to smarmyboss and prepare for the best party of the summer.

No FAT CHICKS!